Re: [OPE-L] On flaming

From: Nicola Taylor (nmtayl@YAHOO.COM.AU)
Date: Mon Nov 27 2006 - 00:20:16 EST

> > I find your contribution to this problem very
> imaginative. Instead
> > showing  ways of how a problem might be solved you
> are suggesting to
> > discriminate against  a member of the list. Rakesh
> may have not chosen
> > the right way of expressing his  concerns but this
> does not give anyone
> > the right to say ignore him.

Dogan, I share your wish that the problem of flaming
on this list be solved in some way.  However, the
problem of flaming has plagued academic (and other)
lists since their inception; it is a difficult and
intractable problem since the flamer must be genuinely
willing to modify his/her own behaviour. In other
words I can tell a person that his/her language (or
style of communication) is offensive to me and request
that he/she modify their behaviour, but if the person
refuses to do so, what then?

In my post I shared a PERSONAL solution to the flaming
problem: ignore the person who persists. I shared this
solution as I have found that it works very well in
defusing situations.  It takes two to argue, after

On your suggestion that I have no "right" to ignore
Rakesh: well, I've yet to meet someone who reads
EVERYTHING that comes into their mailbox.  More
importantly, avoiding someone who continuously
harasses me is a choice that I would prudently
exercise in real life, everyday situations (both
online and offline).  Would you put up, for example,
with harassment in your home or classroom?  Would you
accept harassment from a partner or stranger?  Frankly
I would not.  Imo nobody has a right to harrass
another.  On the contrary, Jerry, myself, indeed
everyone on this list, has a right to communicate free
from personal harassment.

Finally, please note that I did not advocate that
anyone/everyone 'discriminate' against Rakesh by
ignoring him; on the contrary I clearly upheld his
right to express himself and communicate with
anyone/everyone who wants to talk to him.  If his form
of expression produces negative reactions in some of
us, and if some of us choose to ignore him, this is
not discrimination but a direct, understandable and
legitimate reaction to his own behaviour.

In solidarity

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